The Secret of the Kitsune
by bazooie
Summary: Shippo has a secret that's he's been hiding for a while...he finally can't take it and writes it down in a journal! But therein lies the danger...writing it down means that someone could read it!
1. Secrets, Secrets Are No Fun

Mwahahaha my 3rd fic! This is great! I should PROBABLY finish my 1st one, but too bad. I'm gonna write this one! And there's a special bonus story (that some of you might remember) after the main feature!

The sad and dismal truth: I, as shocking as it may seem, DO NOT OWN Inuyasha OR the rest of the cast (gasp!). I KNOW. I'M SURPRISED TOO.

Summary: Shippo decides to put some of his soul on paper. It's getting too hard for him to keep some secrets...

OH and here are some symbol guides...

---------is the start of the story and the end

--!!--is where his writing is broken by something that's actually happening.

And that's about all that you need to know....

---------heh it's starting

Dear Journal,

I...I don't know quite how to say this. It's been plaguing me for a while...whether or not I should tell her. But I fear her reaction. Oh Kagome...if only you knew.

It's just getting so hard to keep it to myself, you know? It's heavier every time I see her, or Inuyasha smacking me, thinking I'm just some twerpy kid. But...the truth is...I'm NOT just some little kid. I'm about 20 in human years.

I bet you're wondering why my age matters (who I'm referring to, I don't know. I want someone to read this...but...no, I don't want that). I feel like such a pervert. I AM such a pervert. Because you see, since Kagome thinks I'm just some little kid, she'll let me sleep with her and sit all over her. Sometimes having a baby face has its advantages—wait, what am I saying? THIS IS WRONG!! I shouldn't even be DOING something like this. I know better. It's horrible to mislead all my friends. Especially Kagome...she's the one who helped me with the Thunder Brothers. But...I love her so much. It hurts. I...used to think I was strong but...she showed me how dependent I am. I need her now.

But therein lies the problem...Inuyasha loves her too. He's done everything except tell anyone. It's so obvious...the way he fawns over her...how can I even compete with him? I'm some fox demon whose physical advancements stopped at age 8, and he's...he's stronger than I'll ever be. And hotter. To be blunt, he is. Just look at him! He's got long silver hair that cascades down his shoulders...the height, the build, the face, everything! He even overcame the fact that he's a half demon! What the hell do I have? I HAVE A FRIGGIN BOW IN MY HAIR. I have a tail that looks like someone zapped it. My eyes are too big for my face, my hair is dry and deathly, and the only semi-helpful thing I can possibly do is PLANT MUSHROOMS ALONG A PATH TO SHOW WHERE I AM ONCE I'M LOST AND OTHER TRICKSTER MAGIC. But that's what I am, isn't it...a trickster. I never thought about it. I'm tricking people even when I don't mean to. I—

--!!--(a/n: I have to put stuff after the dashes or they won't show up)

"Hey Shippo, what're you scribbling madly in that book of yours?" AH CRAP, KAGOME!

"Uh, uh NOTHING! I'm, um, ergh, WRITING FOOTNOTES!!!" Why I'm smiling extra broadly I'm STILL not sure.

"Really? What book ya reading, whelp?" INUYASHA TOO? Geez, is the whole world out to get me?

"It's...it's...Paradise Lost!"

"Never heard of it." Inuyasha, don't walk over here...oh no he's going to pick up the book! HE'S GOING TO READ IT! Think fast, Shippo, think fast—

"Oh Inuyasha, it's a great book! Here I'll explain it to you..." THANK YOU KAGOME. Yes lead him away, my fair sweet—AAHH WHAT AM I THINKING?

--!!--(a/n: moving on...)

Sorry about that...what a close call. I know I'm not going to be able to keep my secret much longer...why am I writing this down? I should probably burn it...I don't WANT anyone to find out. It was stupid to even START this. But...I want someone to know! It's so hard...to keep yourself hidden from your best friends...the people who stick up for you when no one else does...but what if they don't like me when they realize how old I am? I can't think about that...I can't handle it, even hypothetically. Dammit. Now I DEFINITELY don't want anyone to know...but what if someone finds this? Where am I going to put this book...where no one's going to read it...I KNOW! In my shirt! It's small enough to fit...it's about the size of a "CD case" (Kagome showed me one) and not too bulgy, so it should work. And if it doesn't, I'll just find somewhere else. I'll get Kirara to help me or something. She knows where to hide stuff. One time, she had this small rat demon that she had killed, and she wanted to save it for later, so she put it in Inuyasha's bed—

WHY AM I SAYING THIS?

No one cares about that! Then again, no one cares about this either...after all, I am just the little kid. I hate being the stupid little kid. Always the one with the high piercing voice. It's so hard to make that now...at first it wasn't. When I first met Kagome I was scared enough to piss myself, so of course my voice was high...and I hadn't really hit puberty yet, so it's not like my voice was low ANYWAY. But now...it's really hard. I can barely breathe at the end of the day, my throat is so sore. I bet you're wondering if it hurts so much, why am I still doing it?

I'm as clueless as you.

I guess I'm afraid of losing all that I have...Sango, Miroku, Kirara, Inuyasha and Kagome...seeing their shock, maybe even their horror...especially Inuyasha (after all, I DID tell him to go bathe with Kagome (and feigned not knowing what that was) once). I've gotta stop talking about this. It's driving me insane. At least now I've told someone...I feel a little better. Well...maybe not. Ah, we're moving on from camp (we took a little break for some water) (Kagome sensed a jewel shard). Wish us luck against the demon (when I say us, I mean everyone BUT me).

---------it ended poo

And that's that! Wasn't that lovely? Poor Shippo...I bet you never thought about him being older than he seems, eh? Don't worry...there's going to be some comedy...Ehehehe sexual comedy (that's right I said SEXUAL. Deal with it if you're some overprotective parent...or an impressionable young one). But perhaps I should prepare you for the worst...with this...special...EXTRA!!

note: My friend and I were im-ing each other and we got to talking about Inuyasha...it started out with a movie. Please note, I'm not going to tie in Shippo turning into a tampon into the actual story. I just think he CAN. And sorry it's so rambly...and long. But skip it if you don't want to read it.

Person 1: such an odd movie...who thinks up these plots?

Person 2: hehe

Person 2: u begin to wonder

Person 1: yeah I know...

Person 2: they're almost as insane as us otaku (note: otaku are extreme anime fans)

Person 1: ...maybe otaku think them up...?

Person 1: and have matching outfits?

Person 1: like in Inuyasha?

Person 1: with all the same pants...

2: no no no otaku would have schoolgirls like Kagome everywhere

1: maybe it was a "buy the same 2 outfits, get the 3rd one free..."

1: oh true

2: hehehe

2: or they were donated from goodwill

1: hehehe that too

1: "mommy this is CRAP"...I know, let's give it to the priestesses!

1: ...then why does Inu wear one...?

2: AHAHHAA

1: ...he's a girl!!

2: er

1: he just has to come out and say it ;)

1: hehehehe

2: kikyo gave him an extra

1: no wonder his brother wants to pummel him

1: brother to a crossdresser...

2: they were tired of seing his ding dong running around

1: heheheh that too

2: but sesshy runs around too in girl clothes 2

2: only he looks hot in them

1: oh yes...maybe it's like a family of hot cross dressers...?

1: INUYASHA FOR THE LAST TIME PUT SOME CLOTHES ON...WE'RE NOT HIPPO DEMONS

2: GOD INUYASHA NOO

2: WE DONT WANNA C HOW FAR U CAN PISS

1: hehehehe...NO DON'T PUT YOUR LITTLE DOO LADEY ON THAT!!

2: NONONONONONO THATS A KID

1: ::mousetrap snaps::

2: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

1: hehehehe kid with mousetrap

2: poor inu

2: now u know why he wears pants

1: hehehe the story behind the pants

1: that's why inuyasha never takes them off

2: thats great

2: or the body under the pants

2: those are pretty cool hammer pants

1: oh I know!

2: he's lucky kikyo gave them to him

1: heh yeah, otherwise his little attachment might have...

2: because if miroku knew he was a eunich he would suck inuyasha up

1: well, he wouldn't have been a full male package, if you will

1: oh he would

2: declaring him a "menace to female society"

2: hehehe

2: and "unfit for love"

1: hahahahaha...and then he's like "bear my children anyway"

2: ahahahahhaa

2: that's why inuyasha isnt a letch like miroku

1: and it all makes sense...

1: ::light comes on in head::

2: ooooooo better yet

2: he's been neutered

1: ...!!! too horny for his own good

1: hehehehe

2: someone made mountain oysters when he was asleep

1: oooh yes...

2: mmmmmmmm

2: AHAHAHAHA

1: slurp

1: :D hehehe

2: yesssssssss

1: yeah!

2: :-D

1: it could be a story...Inu and company go to the vet

2: (laughing so hard now)

1: and inu loses something on the way

1: something rather important

2: HAHAHAHA

2: oops now how did that fall out

1: hehehehehe

2: miroku: wow ur pretty small for a dog

1: snort hehehehehehe

2: I'm bigger that that

1: and the war of manhoods is on

2: sango: WTF?? (whack)

1: hehehehehehe

2: ok boys pull em out nice n easy

1: laughing so hard...

1: hahahahahahahahahahahaha

1: and then shippo's like no I rule you all

2: miroku: crap

1: and kagome's like OO it's so big

1: for such a small creature...

2: shippo i thought that was a stick

2: in the bed

1: hehehehe he doesn't know his own functions quite yet ;)

2: oO

1: hehehe

2: miroku: yeah well wait till i see a pretty girl

2: or think of one

1: and then we'll see who really is the master

2: thoughts : (sesshoumaru, if onlly u knew)

1: it's a war of the manhoods!! and sango and kagome are like dear God run, run!!

1: oh man and then sesshy comes in and he's like LOOK i'm walking the dog

1: with my pants

2: SANGO: OH MY GOD HOW DID U DO THAT

1: hehehehehahahahaha

2: oO

2: miroku: whatever so sesshy' san inch longer, doesnt matter as long as i'm more flexible that all of u (grin)

1: ooohhh hehehe :D

2: watch this hip action

1: yes go miroku!!!

2: woohooo

1: it's like hypnotics with hips

1: 101

2: kagome oO

1: xactly

2: great huh

1: vair!!!!!!

2: poor inuyasha got dizzy

1: hehehehehehe he's like OO I didn't even know it could MOVE that way...

2: sesshy's like,,,,,,,,,, (i wonder how that feels)

1: and then kaede comes in and is like DEAR GOD!!!!

1: hehehehehe sesshy...

2: MIROKU TAKE ME

1: hahahahahaha

2: grin

1: Kaede: I WILL BEAR YOUR CHILDREN

1: i want to...

2: NO UR TOO OLD

2: GO AWAY

1: and then sango's like no I will bear your children

2: adn then sesshy's like NO I"LL BEAR UR KIDS

1: and the whole time naraku's taking notes and checking out sesshy

1: I believe in miracles...

2: (hmmmmmm how can a HUMAN be bigger than me)

1: hehehehehe

2: and miroku's still going

2: hahahahaha watch and learn

1: throughout this whole thing hehehehehehehe

2: miroku: look around the world

2: walk the dog

1: hehehehehehehehe

1: cat's cradle

2: look it can even dance

1: (snort) hehehehehehe

2: (six flags theme)

2: do do do do do dooooooodoooooooo do do do do dooooooooooodo

1: and then kikyo's

1: the old man!!!!

1: cuz she is so evil

1: and wrinkly

2: pulls out hers

1: ...!!!!! OO

1: i bet she IS a guy...

1: hahaha

2: inuyasha: WTF

2: naraku : even' SHE"S bigger than me

1: yeah and she's like "didn't you know...? how'd you miss THAT??"

1: hahahahahahaha

2: inuyasha: oooooooooo i thought that was where u kept ur extra arrows

1: snort VAIR extra arrows

2: kikyo: i do , but i only fire it when necessary

2: everyone else: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

1: ooohhh hoho

2: mwahahahaha

1: yeah poor kago--WAIT, if she's a reincarnation...

1: that means...

2: no no no

1: ::lifts up skirt:: AHHHHH!!!

2: ooooo it's safe

2: miroku: DO IT AGAIN

1: thank goodness...

1: hehehehe

2: miroku: I DOnt think u checked well enough

1: here, let me feel around up there and check for you

2: kagome: whatev..............wait what's that

2: OH shit

2: i feel it

1: hahahahahaha

2: miroku: LEMME C

1: ...!!! OMG, it IS there...

1: duh duh duh!!!

2: cut it off

2: NOW

2: but kagome

2: NOWW

1: ::inuyashas gets scissors gladly::

1: ::sesshy beats him to it::

1: sesshy's like YES!!!

2: miroku pushes them aside grabs kagome and runs off

1: hehehehehehehehehehe

2: (this is a dream come true, she's got the best of both worlds)

1: ooohhh hehehehehe

1: miroku's gone caesar!

1: (aka he's bi)

2: nononnno

1: ...no?

2: he is just interested

1: ooohh okay ;)

2: and a bit intrigued

2: sesshy is bi

1: hehehehe go sesshy!

1: hearts for the hot man

1: er, demon

2: snaps too

2: kagome: let go

miroku: but wait...........

2: (sesshy pops up)

1: hehehehehe and he's like no my turn

2: ME FIRST

1: ::pushes miroku aside like toddlers on playground::

2: grabs miroku n leaves

1: ...!! AHAHAHAHAHA.

2: hahahahhahaha

1: oooooohhhh dearie...

1: and kagome's like ...

1: and sango's just like...this made no sense!!!

1: and shippo looks at her with fawny eyes and is like "and how..."

2: suddenly her boomerang changes shape

1: snort

2: and she's like

2: SO THATS what body part this was made from

2: naraku grabs his and grimaces

1: OOOOOHHHH hahahahahahaha

1: and then inu's like all for inu, all for inu!

2: come to papa

1: ::hugs it tightly::

1: naraku's like no wait, I NEED that more than you...

1: inu: yeah like u know what to do

1: loser

1: ooohhh yes ;)

2: ahahahha

1: hehehehehehehe

1: and then sango's like HOW do YOU know what to do, inu?

1: and he just runs away with it

2: MINE

1: hehehehehe

1: and sango is like "......"

2: runs deep into the woods

2: CRAP GIVE THAT BACK INUYASHA

2: NOOOOOOOOOOO

1: ...so THAT'S why sango never needed a guy around

1: she had her own device

2: MY BOOMERANG HAS BEEN VIOLATED by someone else

1: hehehehehe

2: aahahahaha

1: I was using that...!

2: slowly backs away

2: oh well ...............NARAKU

1: hehehehe and he's like I SCORED WITH SOMEBODY!!!

1: and then shippo looks around and his eyes fall on concubine kaede...

1: and he's like OH HELL NO

2: sang: no .................i just wanna watch u

2: naraku: damn

1: hehehehehe

1: and she's like go for it, baboon man

1: ::looks at appendages:: er, boy

2: shippo slowly backs away as kikyo begins to slither toward him

1: hehehehehe

2: "PLEASE SHIPPO, only u can scratch my itch, help me"

1: ooohhh and he's like...help? PLEASE??

2: shippo's mind( NARAKU's lookin pretty hot right now)

2: oh kagome

1: he's like oh I took care of you

2: hehehe

2: that's why he n kaede r so close

1: oooohhhh yes it is...she uses him as her tampon!!!

2: AHAHAHAHAHAHA

2: oh dear lord, i'm laughing so hard

1: I just couldn't resist, with his tail and all...

1: I mean, what does it look like?

2: thats why his fur looks like that

1: hehehehe I know!

2: all coppery n crap

2: hehehe

1: and so fluffy

1: hehehehehe no wonder girls like him

2: no wonder inu doesnt like him

1: yeah that too hehehehehehe

2: kagome's carryaround tampon

2: inu: hey where's shippo

1: hahahahaha so that's why he disappears from many episodes at a time...

1: and kagome's like oh shippo's around...

2: miroku: yeah and why does ur skirt look so funny today kagome

1: HAHAHAHAHA...

2: kag: o u kno new underwear

1: and miroku's like can i test it out?

2: miroku: WTF? dont tell me u switched to granny panties

1: hehehehehehe

2: sango: U LIE U WORE THOSE LAST WEEK

2: everyone: Oo

1: hahahahahahahaha and they're like sango how do you know...

2: sango: (Big blush)

1: sango's like...what? I mean, I just, well...HER ASS IS IN MY FACE ALL DAY, WHAT ELSE AM I GONNA LOOK AT??

1: shippo:: mff!!

1: inu: what was that?

2: miroku: so U like kagome too

2: MASS ORGY

1: oh yes it is...although shippo's too busy to be involved

1: and then kirara's like OO ?

2: shippo: YEAH I DONT NEED Y"ALL

2: I"LL DO IT MYSELF

1: ewww and then myoga!!!!

1: ewwww shippo!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA

2: ahahahhaha

2: miroku: sigh i wish i was a flea sometimes

1: you know there's an illicit sex tape floating around that they had to cut out of the show...

2: then i could fit anywhere

2: yup

2: i said hug him inuyasha not MAKE OUT with him

2: SANGO put DOWN the camera

1: hehehehe and then inu's like DAMMIT

1: ::sango runs away laughing::

2: miroku: (turns to kagome) MY place or urs

1: rumiko: ...-- OO i've created a monster...

1: kagome: oh, let's just go right here!

1: shippo: can I join you too?

1: miroku: the more the merrier, birth control pill

1: shippo: ...what?

2: rumiko: man first ranma now inuyasha, geez how was i to know they'd turn out gay. ranma doesnt even wanna be a boy anymore

1: hehehehe

2: shippo: WHAT's birth control

1: miroku: you're um, involved some how...now I need you to become a tampon again

1: shippo: ...?!? I charge I hope you know

2: kagome: Oo WTF what have U been using shippo

1: Miroku: ...

2: Shippo U need to USE SOMETHING??

2: kag: what about stds

2: miroku: we dont have any

2: kagome: great pulls out her yellow bookbag and dumps it out, throwing away all the condoms

1: hehehehehe

2: mirkou: that's why it's so heavy

2: inuyasha blushes

2: sango: CRAP THATS WHY U LEAVE to find "kikyo" so much

1: Inu: I'm a busy man...

1: kag: a MINUTE man...

1: all collectively look at ground

1: hehehehehehe

2: and come back so soon

2: miroku : ur a disgrace to man

1: inu: yeah well you do it with a preying mantis

1: miroku: guilty as charged ;)

2: shippo : yeah i'm at least a minuite and a half

1: kagome: WTF SHIPPO???

2: miroku : but i last allllllll night long

1: kaede: oh yeah i can vouch for him

2: no stamina at all

1: i can never look at inuyasha the same EVER again

1: you know they're gonna say something and we're just gonna laugh

2: HAHAHA sango's boomerang

1: like kagome's gonna be like "where's shippo?"

2: whenever she throws it

1: oh yeah heheheheheheha

2: HAHAHAHAHA

1: and then we're like oh look inu's pants look baggier... ;)

2: hahahaha

2: what's that lump

1: hehehehehehe

2: that's why kagome takes so many bathes after talking to sesshoumaru

1: ooohhh yeah

1: and why her bag's so heavy...

1: and why her skirt bulges on ocassion

1: and where inu actually goes...

1: and miroku's "exorcism of demons" with much pelvic activity

2: ahahaha

Did you guys actually make it down here? THAT'S AMAZING. And sorry for those who are like WTF this is so wrong...I was going to edit it for content, but then nothing would be there. What a waste. Please R and R! Okay why is the extra longer than the feature...?


	2. Ramen

Well I'm back again (but without a brand new mission, thank you Vanilla Ice)! Aren't you all excited! Hmm...I'm seeing some rather panicky faces. I'm going to take that as a GOOD sign though. You must be panicking because you love me so much :D.

REVIEW RESPONSES! We all love those, right?

earthqueen—Thank you for reviewing!!! I'm glad you like the Shippo bit (which actually was the POINT of the story) (like the plot)...hehehe I see I confused you with the extra though. Well that makes sense...there were some inside jokes...that you probably wouldn't get. And not everyone thinks of that sort of stuff...but it was just fun to put on there anyway. I am a horny teen and proud. I probably just lost any fans I might have had saying that...

dancing barefoot in my socks—I like Mr. Parker...he's pretty kewl. Although I do agree, you are NOT the lackadaisical 4 L's of Lovett. I'm glad you like my story! I'm so sorry Shippo is your pal (people with questions, see the extra in chappie 1) (by the way, I know her, so I'm not verbally assaulting some stranger). And heh I was reading it over your shoulder outloud to the whooooole library. But I am glad you recommended it!!

kioken—Thank you for reviewing!! It means my heart and soul (well at least part of them). I'm glad you liked the first part! Although it appears that you were confused by the extra as well...sorry for the confusion...it wasn't there to advance the plot, just for fun.

Well...now that's out of the way...and seeing as I haven't updated in a while...PLEASE don't hurt me for that, because that is HORRIBLY mean...I shall now update the SECOND CHAPTER!! Whoo hoo!

Disclaimer: As much as I'm sure it disheartens you all to here me say this...I must say it. I DO NOT OWN INUYASHA ::collective gasp:: I KNOW, I know, I'm just as shocked as you are. But I realize that now...they can take our lives...but...THEY CANNOT TAKE OUR FANFICS! Yay Willie Wallace! Well...except for the English...who would not yay him EVER...and seeing as I'm doing a theological report on Edward II (I think it's II...I'M NOT EVEN SURE (how sad is that?)) so if any of you can help, PLEASE DO!! Oh wait, this was supposed to be the disclaimer. Sorry about that...

-----------means THE STORY IS STARTING. I'd forgotten what I was using...

-!!-means a break in Shippo's journal writing...again, a reminder for myself...

--------------------------------------------------------

I know it's been a while, but I haven't gotten a whole lot of time to write in this thing. Either someone's been around, or we've been fighting (well the rest of them) demons for jewel shards, or I've been taking on the midget sibling to the Thunder Brothers...and that definitely put a break in my writing. I'm sure you're all curious as to what's been going on with my, er, condition, so I shall update you.

Sango has FINALLY told Miroku she loves him! I mean, it was so obvious to us all...except the monk, oddly enough...he just thought she was reconsidering bearing his children (not the case). He was a little shocked, but very receptive. They went off to...for lack of a better term, "have bathing fun". I know this because I was out gathering mushrooms for Kagome to make dinner, and I saw her tell him...it makes me feel a little more courageous about eventually telling Kagome that I love her.

...Wait a second, WHAT AM I SAYING? I can never EVER tell Kagome that I love her! She'd either think that a) I'm a twerpy fluffball, b) I'm a pervert since I've been sleeping with her, c) I am nuts and will never speak to me again. AND Inuyasha would beat the crap out of me...and all that other stuff I mentioned in the last section. Oh, Kirara just walked up...I don't mind HER reading it, since she's not going to tell anyone...she can't SAY anything. Although she is making some odd sort of chuckling noises...I hope she can't read.

Apparently Kagome is having her womanly time of the month...she's been a little...odd lately, more bipolar than anything else. One minute she's telling Inuyasha how well he's been progressing with Tetsusaiga, the next she's sitting him off a 30 foot cliff (and she DID, too...he ate her ramen while she was changing tampons in the bushes, and she got really mad). We're all being fairly tolerant...but it gets hard not to comment when she runs up to Miroku and just shoves him down for no apparent reason...Sango just looks at her like she's mental, then nods like she understands. All I can say is that I thank my luck that I was born male and do not have to put up with blood coming slooooowly out of my butt for 6 days (Inuyasha and I can smell it, so we know how long it lasts...not a great time to be near her).

-!!-(sorry, it needs text, remember?)

"Shippo! Sango! Miroku! Inu—GET YOUR HANDS OUT OF THE RAMEN, INUYASHA! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! AH CRAP, now the RAMEN'S SPILLED EVERYWHERE!" Like I said, Kagome's just a little menstrual.

"Good GOD, Kagome, THAT HURT!" Hehe, his face is bruised...which I shouldn't be taking pleasure out of, but I am anyway (it's always fun to watch, and the bruises fade in about 10 seconds anyway).

"Well I wouldn't have to sit you if you would just WAIT FOR ME TO GIVE YOU YOUR RAMEN!"

"I WAS HUNGRY, DAMMIT! You were taking FOREVER!"

"Next time I'LL LET YOU EAT THE DRY NOODLES!"

"Fine!!"

"I'd rather eat Shippo's mushrooms than dry Ramen..." Why thank you Sango, I had no idea my screaming, teary-eyed mushrooms would be tastier than dry Ramen.

"I don't know, I think I'd prefer the Ramen than mushrooms that would WATCH me." I have to go with Miroku, I would go for the Ramen too.

"I'll tell you what, Sango, since you'd prefer the mushrooms, Shippo can feed you!" Kagome really has got to get on the pill...I don't see why she hasn't, actually. I mean, if I KNOW about it (read about it in her biology book), SHE should know about it (and therefore use it). Then she wouldn't be out to kill us a week every month.

"Umm, that's okay, I'll eat the Ramen..."

"AND THE MONK CAN EAT THE DRY RAMEN!! EAT IT MONK!!" WOW is she mad...

"Sango, don't you and I have that...that THING to go to?"

"Why YES, I believe we do!!" I never realized how fast Miroku and Sango could run away from danger...

"...Not to be suggesting anything, but couldn't you just make more Ramen, Kagome?" Inuyasha...that was a STUPID thing to do....

HOLY CRAP HER FACE IS GOING TO EXPLODE. It's seriously purple...and her hair is rising up...

"You want more Ramen, Inuyasha?" Oh God, with that tone of voice...this is making my hair stand on end...the "calm" before the storm....

"Umm...yes...?" Oh great, NOW he notices how seriously pissed and violent she is....

"THEN YOU CAN FUCKING PREPARE IT FOR YOURSELF!! I AM GOING TO BED AND YOU CAN ALL GO CLIMB IN A DITCH AND EAT ROADKILL FOR ALL I CARE!!" Man...when she shouts, she SHOUTS...wait, she said FUCK? She NEVER cusses...and true to her word, she's going into the little hut that we found in the woods.

Inuyasha fell over...he looks shocked. Stupid dog...can he NOT sense when Kagome is about to rampage? Maybe we should attack Naraku when Kagome's having her period...she'd probably kill him off just by looking at him, let alone screaming like that. I'll suggest that when she's NOT about to castrate everything in sight...

"Inuyasha, you have GOT to learn you can't mess with Kagome when she's mad." I can't mention anything sexually oriented, he thinks I'm innocent...and if he even doubts that for a little bit, I lose so many privileges.

"Shut up and help me make more Ramen, whelp." Oh wah, Inuyasha, to think you were shouted down. THAT'S a shock.

"You know, I think I'll be more of a burden than a help." It's true...it isn't an insult to his manhood...it's a win-win situation.

"Hmm..." wait, why is he looking at me like that? AHHH don't pick me up!! Hey!!

"LET ME GO!! I DON'T LIKE HANGING UPSIDEDOWN!!"

"KAGOME, CAN WE EAT SHIPPO INSTEAD?" NOOO don't eat me!!! I'm all fluff!! I have NO nutritional value! Ask ANYTHING that's tried to eat me before!!

...I didn't know Kagome could get flames to generate out of her...oh...holy...sh—

"INUYASHA SIT! SIT!" OWW, OWW wait, he HASN'T let me go yet! Let him let go of me and THEN you can sit him all you want!!

"SIT! SIT! SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT—OH MY GOD, SHIPPO!!" Yes...oh my face...my body...my nads...ahhhhhh man I feel sooo bad right now...I can't move...everywhere hurts...I so sympathize with Inuyasha right now...who was on top of me this whole time...so he added his weight onto me...but it's okay, because now I'm in her arms. All is right with the world.

"Shippo, I am sooo sorry! Your fur! Your tail! Your...pants...have a tear..." Why is she turning so red...OH MY GOD MY PANTS HAVE A HUGE TEAR IN THE CROTCH. And EVERYTHING is showing...but not for long, I am SO covering it up right now...thank God for puffy tails.

"Are you okay otherwise...?"

"Yeah..." Aside from the fact that I've just been physically abused and utterly humiliated, yes...

"C'mon, Shippo, I'll treat you cuts and sew your pants while Inuyasha makes dinner." Ahh...the pain I suffer is not in vain then...good, good...

"WAIT, why do I still have to make dinner?"

"Because, Inuyasha, you SPILT the Ramen all over the ground, and it would be only right if you remade it." That's some logic you can't argue with.

Hmm...what was that look that just crossed his face? It looked like...he was hurt...but maybe I just imagined it...?

"Aren't you at least going to at LEAST apologize to me for sitting me...?" Again, is it just me, or does he sound sulky?

Now KAGOME looks hurt...or worried...no, wait don't set me down, Kagome...why are you hugging him instead of me...?

"Inuyasha...I just...I got really mad, you know? Because...it's that time of the month, so I mean, I'm a little...it's not an excuse, I know, but I'm sorry I sat you so much."

...He's hugging her back...

"It's okay, Kagome...I didn't mean to drive you mad."

"Which you so often do."

"Which I so often do." He's smiling now...and brushing her hair...

"Look, we can go into the hut and I'll fix you up, okay? I'll get to dinner afterwards."

"Sounds like a plan." They're walking into the hut, arms around each other's hips...

...why are my eyes stinging...?

-!!-!

Kagome never came back for me...or for dinner. I just sat where she had dropped me...I didn't have anything better to do...so I just pulled out my diary and started writing...I guess I shouldn't...feel bad, you know...they look so...good together...I...I...should be happy for them...after all, if she and I were together...it would be so...odd...she, so beautiful, and me...a fluffball...

But I can't stop feeling horribly. I know I shouldn't...but nothing is making me feel better. I made more Ramen, hoping to lure them back out of the hut, but to no avail. I just ate as much as I could and left the rest out for Sango and Miroku...although I know they won't be back for a while (more bathing fun). Kirara's off hunting...so I guess I'm all alone for a while...but it's okay, I've been alone before...after all, the moon only just rose...

The moon's only a quarter of the way across the sky...

It's only...almost...morning...doesn't anyone want the Ramen...?

And...I hesitate to write this, but...Kagome and Inuyasha...were...having sex...oh God, writing it just makes it more real...I could hear them...I could smell them...don't they have any shame? What am I going to do...?

I guess I shouldn't do anything...what CAN I do...? If I do something, then everyone will know my secret...they'll hate me...I don't want them to ever know.

Oh, Sango and Miroku are returning...it looks like they had fun during the night...

"Oh, Shippo, what are you doing up at the crack of dawn?" Well, Sango, I'm not quite sure...I can't tell you what kept me up...

"I...I made Ramen, last night...I can reheat it, if you want..." I can hear the pathetic note in my voice even as I speak.

"Are you okay? Your fur's matted on your face...did it rain while we were gone?" Always the concerned one, aren't you monk...? Well where were you last night?

"It was dewy this morning."

"Oh...well...where are Inuyasha and Kagome?" Sango, don't look at me like that, I'm not going to bite your ass off.

"In the hut."

"Ah." Yes, Miroku looks like he understands what happened..."Did they spend the whole night together in there?"

"Yes." I can feel the heat flow through my eyes...

"Ah." Why don't you say something else, monk?

"Shippo...where did you spend the night, if they were in there...?" Ah, thank you for your concern, Sango.

"Around camp." I'm not going to tell her that I sat in one spot the whole night, and my muscles are just now feeling the aftermath...after all that sitting and not moving for a while, they are searing with painful cramps.

"Shippo..."

I wonder what she can possibly say to make me feel better.

She's...stroking my head. It feels pretty nice, actually. "Be strong." And now she's walking away again with the monk. But I don't feel bad...I feel...stronger...

Thanks, Sango.

-------------------------------------------------------

I couldn't think of another way to end it...I was afraid it was going to drag on and on for a while. And then I'd only have a 2 chapter story...I think it's been pretty good so far for having no idea where it's headed (well except for one thing). Soo if you have plot suggestions, by all means, SUGGEST THEM! If I like them, I'll incorporate them.

There aren't any extras this time...that must make some of you VERY happy.

Please R and R! I'll try to update as soon as possible!


	3. Caffeine and Craters

It's the most...oddly entertaining time...of the year...when I am BACK to write again! Some of you fear me...some of you think I'm really..."special"...but obviously if you've gotten here, you want to see what happens (well either that or see if I'll finally tell you the meaning of life. Those of you who think this last part should probably stop reading now...I don't know any spiritual sort of stuff like that. However, I do know a lot about orcas...well not a lot, but...well, never mind).

Ha...ha...ha...in the spirit of the season, I'm going to be CREEPIER THAN USUAL!!! That makes even ME scared...and I have to LIVE with myself. Shivers of disgust all around.

Ah yes, my ever-so-appreciated reviewers! And...there WERE THREE!! BUT I respond to them with love (platonic love of course). And these are going to be long ones...because they're full of appreciation!! YAY!! TRIPLE YAY!!

Dancing barefoot in my socks—Yeah isn't it sad that they had sex in front (not directly in front, but sort of in front) of Shippo? Hmm...so you want to be involved, eh? I could work that in...I think. Just read until the end of the chappie and find out.

Td—That's an interesting name...hmm...Isn't Souten the small girl thunder demon? OHHH THAT'S HER NAME...OMG THANK YOU...I couldn't remember it when I was typing up the previous chappie. Maybe I COULD make it a Shippo/Souten...I'll have to see where it goes. And I definitely think it could creep that way...OH GOODIE!! Thankies again muchly!! AND you like my story!! Man...I don't think my day could GET much better.

Silent Sky—Yay I'm glad someone thinks I'm funny! Um...that was a bit to enthusiastic...ehehe...don't mind me. Yeah the IM thing was...odd...different...perverted...but as I stated somewhere before (I don't even know where...), I am a horny teen and proud (come to think of it, not too proud...but fine with it). I'm one of those people who if you don't know me, I take some getting used to...hmmm I can't imagine why O: ). Although I am confused why it's disturbing that I'm a girl (you heard it here first, folks, I am female)...girls are fun...we're all cuddly and cute and whatnot. I'm actually kinda GLAD I sound like a guy while writing this story...because Shippo is in fact as guy (REVELATION!!). And if I didn't write like a guy here, then it would make Shippo look gay (he's making it hard enough for me already...STUPID BOW IN HIS HAIR...how do I make that seem at least NORMAL instead of homo?!?). So I take it as a compliment!!

Oh, and about the whole period thing...I get the worst cramps EVER EVER EVER, so I DEFINITELY do not view the cramp bringer with fondness...(btw I obviously do know what I'm talking about...IT'S NO FUN)...I semi-based Kagome's behavior on mine...because I really DO get mad at everyone...(and I know I'm being a bitch, and then I immediately apologize, but MY GOD even 2 WHOLE FRIGGIN ADVILS won't work...and the little thermacare thing...those are so nice :D but crampies still come through...). And man on those days I wish I was a guy...just so I wouldn't have to plan my day around period fun...

For those of you who thought I was to descriptive: At least either YOU DON'T HAVE IT or if you DO, you just don't have really bad cramps that make you sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes while the advil kicks in at like 2 am...SO if you didn't like it (or didn't know what a "period" was, in which case you need to go to sex ed), that's just the way nature works...

Oh, but I'm so glad you thought the story was entertaining! That's what I live for!!

Well THAT was a long response to a review...see what you're missing, all you people who aren't reviewing? Maybe YOU should review and get those types of responses! Wait...I just chased off any possible reviewers I might have had, didn't I...good job, me, goooooood job...

A SHOCKING SECRET REVEALED!! I do NOT own Inuyasha, although I have gotten THOUSANDS upon THOUSANDS (snorthaasifwheeze) of emails, postcards, telegrams, letters, TV promos, billboard announcements, popup ads, marketing gimmicks, radio commercials, commercials in general, computer glitches, books, movies, plays, buildings, pets, identity cards, cookies, wanted posters, cars, blimps, planes, buses, hot men, warm sweaters, weather irregularities, jewelry, sound bytes, and commemorative memorabilia SAYING that I own Inuyasha!! I am sorry, I do not DO NOT do not own Inuyasha (got it?) OR Sesshomaru OR any of the other people. I also do not own Wafflehouse, but I did visit one last night, and it was as good as I expected from a franchise. OKAY THE POINT IS NO INUYASHA OWNERSHIP FOR ME.

And now...for...the...MOMENT OF FAITH...that...isn't going to test your FAITH AT ALL...it's where...the...STORY STARTS!!

Okay this ------------------------------ is for where the story BEGINS OR ENDS

And this -!!-! is where ACTION is interrupted...I forgot again. Sorry guys.

I have to say, the oddest thing happened three days ago, and I STILL don't understand what went on. Kagome decided she wanted us all to become acquainted with the "technology" of her era, so she brought some stuff back here. I don't know what the hell any of it was...does she expect us to remember? I hope not...maybe I'll get a pat on the head if I know what it is. In that case, I'm going to study all these objects...

Okay the first one's a lovely...metallic beverage container of some sort. It smells bubbly and like cherries. It says "Coke" on the side...wait, is this a drug? I could have sworn she said that it was just caffeinated or something (whatever that means). Well it's already open...she won't notice if I take a sip...OH MY GOD THIS STUFF IS GREAT!! I feel so energized!! I can run laps FOREVER!!!

-!!-!

"INUUUUUYAAAASHA!!!!!!"

"What the hell?!? Shippo, are you drugged?" NOTHING ILLEGAL!!! I'M FOILING THE SYSTEM!!!!!

"WANNA RACE WANNA RACE WANNA RACE!!!"

"Okay WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING...?? Kagome, what did you feed the little rat to make him hyperactive?"

"I didn't give him anything...he just asked to see some of the stuff I brought." YEAH KAGOME'S RIGHT INUYASHA I TOOK MY FREEDOM MWAHAHAHA!!

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" OOPS I SAID MY THOUGHTS ALOUD!!

MAN THEY'RE LOOKING AT ME WEIRD!!! LIKE I'M INSANE!!! I'M NOT CRAZY, I'M JUST A LITTLE UNWELL!!! CAN THEY NOT TELL!!!

"Shippo...I'm going to ask you a simple question...after you had the 6 pocky boxes, did you eat ANYTHING else?" WELL KAGOME I DUNNO HAHA...

"NO I DIDN'T EEEAAAATTTT ANYTHING!!!" OHO I FOUND ANOTHER LOOPHOLE I AM SO CLEVER!!!

"...Okay twerp, I'm gonna strap you down so you won't—HEY PUT MY SPARE CLOTHES DOWN!!" HAHAHA I HAVE INUYASHA'S CLOTHES!!!

WATCH ME, MERE MORTALESQUE DEMON, AS I SCALE THE TREE AND BUNDLE UP IN YOUR CLOTHES HAHAHA CAN'T GET ME NOW!!

"..."

"..."

WHY ARE YOU GUYS LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!!! WHAT---ooooohhhhh my God caffeine's wearing off...uggghh...

"...Shippo...what did you have just now...?" Owww Kagome not so loud...

"It looks like he got drunk and then instantly hung over...kind of..." No Inuyasha I just drank caffeine...I need more...owww my head hurts...

"I didn't get drunk, Inuyasha, I just drank some of the 'Coke' Kagome had..." My tongue feels funny...and I'm burping every few seconds...

"YOU DRANK THE COKE?"

"Yes, Kagome, don't shout!! I drank the Coke! I just wanted to see what would happen!"

"Shippo do you know what caffeine DOES to you if you've never had any before?"

"Noooo..."

"Well it messes with your natural energy production and produces too much too fast, then your body relapses soon after, so it's not a great way to get energy...and you drank the whole can in one gulp, it looks like..."

"Sooo he gets a worse relapse?"

"Yeah, Inuyasha, that's how it works. I'm surprised you could figure it out that quickly."

"WHAT WAS THAT?"

"I didn't say anything..." Oh Kagome, you can't bait him...he reacts too well.

"You SUGGESTED THAT I WAS STUPID...with NO PROVOCATION..."

"And what of it?"

"WENCH!!"

"WHAT'D YOU JUST CALL ME?"

"WENCH! WENCH, WENCH, WENCH, SUPER WENCH, WENCHIEST WENCH, WE—" Here it comes...

"SIT! SIT, SIT, SIT!" Ohh what a lovely crater he's created...

"KAGOME!!"

"Hey Inuyasha!"

"WHAT?"

"Care for a SIT? I like to SIT and SIT and SIT, SIT, SIT for long SITTING periods until my butt gets sore with SITTING and MORE SITTING!" Ohhh...the colors of the bruises...

"SCREW YOUR STUPID ASS, STOP POUNDING MY FACE INTO THE GROUND!!"

"You mumbled, Inuyasha, I couldn't hear you. Care to repeat it?" I think she just wants to beat him soo much...

"..." Good call, Inuyasha, don't say anything to anger her...

"HOJO THINKS YOU'RE A WHORE!!!" Man THAT was a stupid thing to do!!

"SIT YOU BASTARD SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SHIPPO WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR LUNCH SIT, SIT YOUR FACE, INUYASHA, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT..."

"I think I'd like some Ramen or something...maybe some fish?"

"...SIT, SIT, SIT, we could put the fish IN the Ramen! SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT..."

"Good idea, Kagome!"

"Ummm...Kagome, I think he's been sat enough...I see blood..." Oh Sango, you ruined our fun.

"SIT! Yeah, I guess that's good enough. That enough for you, Inuyasha?"

"I...CAN'T...FEEL...MY...BODY..."

"I think he's learned something, then. Shippo, do you want to help me with lunch?" Must you ask?

"Sure, Kagome!"

"While you two are doing that, I'll tend to Inuyasha's...injuries..." I'd be repulsed too if I had to touch him...I wonder how fast his broken shins will set...ah well Sango will help him. And I get time with Kagome...I AM A HAPPY FOX!!

"And I'LL be tending to Sango..." Miroku...

"LECH!!" Ohhh that's one vicious slap she has...and a lovely handprint HE has.

"My pain is worth the love of the most vivacious woman I know."

"Miroku, that is so sweet!" Aww, now all the rest of us guys have to live up to the romantic standard the monk just set...damn.

"Don't fall for it, Kagome, he'll say anything to get on a woman's good side."

"You seem to have fallen for it, Sango, and you're no worse for the ride."

"DO YOU WANT TO BE BEATEN?" I think he does, Sango...yet you're laughing while you say this.

"Go on, you two, go on a walk or something!" Good suggestion Kagome!

"Then who's going to tend to my body...?" Oh that's right, Inuyasha can't move...that's kind of sad. AND YET HORRIBLY FUNNY.

"Okay, okay, Sango, you and Miroku go for a walk, Shippo, you...prod Inuyasha out of his 3 foot hole, and I'll make the Ramen." Hmm I guess I'm okay with that, Kagome...

Wait...how am I going to MOVE him? HE'S FIVE FRIGGIN TIMES MY SIZE! Maybe if I get...a really big...tree branch...ERGH this is heavy...

"SHIPPO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT TREE BRANCH?"

"I'm oof! trying to eeeya! lift you out of the hole!"

"...Okay not with that...you can't even lift it up." Oh don't stuff your head back in the hole in disinterest, half demon, THE THING'S AT LEAST 20 TIMES BIGGER THAN ME. What do you EXPECT?

Maybe if I use one of Kagome's items... (a/n: why does that sound like an RPG?)

...hmmm...

Well...I could use this string and strangle him, but that won't help at all...actually that'd probably make him heavier than he already is...oh and he'd be dead, which would make me pretty sad. Actually it would, don't think I'm being sarcastic...he's like my older brother, in a way.

...there's a "CD player", but it's not large enough to help him...

...would a "biology book" help...? Maybe I could read to him about...well let's flip through this—HOLY CRAP WHAT WAS THAT DIAGRAM? Was that a fox with its stomach cut open...? EWW NOT GOING TO TRY AND FIND OUT...

"Shippo..." Not now, Inuyasha, I'm trying to think how to get you out of the hole.

...maybe the pocky would help...? Like brainfood?

"SHIPPO..."

...actually let's get this paper, stuff it into his mouth and then keep thinking of ideas...

"SHIPPO!!"

"WHAT, INUYASHA, WHAT? I'M TRYING TO THINK OF A WAY TO GET YOU OUT OF THE HOLE!!" Geez!!

...wait a second...you're standing NEXT to me...

"I don't NEED to get out of the hole anymore, whelp. I'M OUT."

"Yeah I can see that, but thanks for pointing it out anyway."

"Some help YOU were."

"I was TRYING to find something to get you out with!"

"Feh." Hey, don't just stalk away from me...get BACK here! I'm telling you, I tried to help!

"HEY! I really did try to help!!"

"Well go help yourself become useful for a change, fluffball."

"KAGOME! INUYASHA'S BEING MEAN TO ME!"

"Inuyasha, why are you being mean to Shippo?"

"I'm NOT being mean to him! I just told him he wasn't helpful!"

"And that's MEAN INUYASHA!" It isn't nice to insult people!

"Why are you ALWAYS running to Kagome for the littlest things! Ooh, Kagome, he's being mean to me! I got dust in my eye! My tail has split ends! A pricker bush attacked me! Why don't you just ACT YOUR AGE?"

...act my age...?

ACT MY AGE?????????

"Inuyasha, now really—"

"ACT MY AGE, INUYASHA? YOU WANT ME TO ACT MY AGE? DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW OLD I AM??? DO YOU—"

...I said too much...they're looking at me like I'm crazy...they know that I'm older than I appear...

"Shippo..." Oh Kagome, don't look at me like that...

...Even Inuyasha looks sympathetic...albeit more shocked, but still...

"I..." What can I say...? What can I do...?

The only thing I know how to away.

-!!-!

Well that's kinda odd how the chappie ended...he never got to write in his journal again. Obviously we're not done here...there's more to come! And don't worry, Shippo's jumping to conclusions...so this isn't the end (or near it) (well maybe, I dunno)...

Okay the whole thing about caffeine, I don't know where that came from...I think there was a coke sitting on my desk. Not mine...I really don't like Coke, so I'm assuming its hyper-inducing abilities...or at least how they would affect someone like me (who never has had a whole lot...whenever I accidentally drink coke (it's happened before...thought it was water and gulped), I get really mad at the bubbles and it makes me generally mad). Oh but anyway, the caffeine thing had like NOTHING to do with ANYTHING...but it was amusing to write .

Please R and R and R and R and R and R! So that's like R to the sixth power! Do that!

OH and if you want to be involved in my story (aka a character in it), put it in your review or email me or something...then I'll try to put ya in!!


	4. Who's the Demon?

THE RECAP!

"ACT MY AGE, INUYASHA? YOU WANT ME TO ACT MY AGE? DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW OLD I AM? DO YOU—"

…I said too much…they're looking at me like I'm crazy…they know that I'm older than I appear…

"Shippo…" Oh Kagome, don't look at me like that…

…Even Inuyasha looks sympathetic...albeit more shocked, but still…

"I…" What can I say…? What can I do…?

The only thing I know how to do…run away.

Voila. A recap for the general masses. THAT ARE THE COOLEST MASSES EVAH! Know why? Because y'all are reading THIS story! YAY!

Ahem. Summer has arrived for everyone in the US (apparently not for those in Europe, or so I've heard). Well most everyone. At any rate for me. Which is why I've had time to update!

Review response time!

A Fan—hmmm I'm glad you're a fan! I always thought Shippo was a little older too…and I always pondered what he would be like when he got physically older. I'll update soon! As in now! Thank you for your lovely review! Hearts!

Fan—hmmm another person called fan…yaaay! Well yours was shorter, but I loved it anyway! I shall update soon! Actually…now!

Dancing barefoot in my socks—okay the coke was in a Styrofoam cup…with a lid that you couldn't see through. I slurped through the straw and was punished with brown bubbly pain up my nose. HOW FUN. I'm so glad I have your sympathies for my crampies…ergh. Souten is the little thunder demon Shippo meets (in one of the newer episodes)…they fight over crayons (hehehe). I'm staying here for Christmas…which is quite nice I think. Do you want to be in the story? Okay…I shall have fun with this then :D. MWAHAHAHA.

Oshan—is this a Me, Myself and Irene rip-off? Cuz if it is, I've never seen that movie. It just reminded me of the title. Yeah, I'm crazy. Jealous? (anyone see that SNL where they made fun of America's Next Top Model?)

Impatient Girl—you reviewed twice with the same comment…and I'm confounded by it. Yeah why is WHAT? It could be anything.

KagSesslove—it is a weird little side story…I suppose it was a spur of the moment bit, you know, when you've eaten a lot of sugar and just start going crazy. Hehe.

KagSesslove—Hehehe well at least you get food while your rampaging female family is on the loose…soo lucky you're not a girl. Although that is still tough.

I realize that Shippo's been slightly moody in all the previous chapters. Well not moody as much as BROODY.

Shippo: Maybe if you FED ME I wouldn't be so broody.

Me: Maybe if you DID WHAT I TOLD YOU TO I wouldn't have to feed you to the rabid raccoons.

Shippo: …rabid raccoons?

Rabid Raccoons: WOAAAARRRR!

Rin: GRAR!

Me: Rin, what are you doing here?

Rin: The raccoons are my family. Ehehehehe.

Me: Back awaaaaay slowly…

Anyway. So since he's been a little broody, this chapter SHOULD (but I never know where I go when I write) be a little less of moody Shippo.

The writing style will also be changing! It's getting a little hard to never use dialogue tags to tell ya who's talking when without them. I'm sure you'll adapt. I won't use them if I don't have to, but if I do, well…that's why they were created.

Oh crap, that means I'm screwed if I STILL make it unclear…well if anyone asks, Kikyo made me do it. The wench.

And now the news.

Female Newscaster: And now, for some more shocking news for the day…BAZOOIE DOES NOT OWN INUYASHA!

Audience: GASP!

Newscaster: It is hard for us ALL to bear, I know. I was going to sell my extremely hot, kind, sexy, talented doctor husband to her in order to obtain copyrights on Inuyasha!

Female fan: OH GOD, NOT ANTONY, NOOOO! HE'S…SO DELICIOUSLY HOT! You CAN'T sell him!

Newscaster: Never fear, for I did not sell my hot Antony! Although I would have for Inuyasha…he means THAT much to me!

Lawyer: Wait, Barbra, you DID sell your husband to Bazooie!

Newscaster: WHAT?

Lawyer: You sold him for…a used gum wrapper…

(Audience sweatdrops)

Newscaster: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Bazooie: HAHAHA AND NOW I HAVE YOUR HOT HUSBAND ANTONY!

Antony: And for picking me, Bazooie, I shall make your evening filled with hot, passionate games.

Bazooie: Like battleship?

Antony: …sure, let's go with that.

(We dash off)

Okay all of that was the disclaimer…BY THE WAY…I try to make them creative. You know, make you entertained…that's what I live for, people, that's what I live for.

This ------ (you see that?) means the story is starting or ending. But it won't appear for some reason, so it starts when I say start! And it ends when I say it's over!

!-! Means Shippo got disturbed from writing and is doing something in the real world or he's writing once again after being interrupted.

start!

I've been running for a while. I'm…not quite sure where I am. There are a lot of trees around, and it's foggy, and the trees don't have leaves. Basically it looks like a creepy haunted forest. Oh wait…what if it IS one of the haunted forests? This could be the one that Kagome told us about around the campfire a few nights ago…where there was a family that ran out of money. Some bandits had strewn salt on the land, so they couldn't grow any food. They started getting hungry. So they went out hunting and found a small kitsune kit to eat…wait I see a shadow in the fog! IT'S THE FATHER WITH THE KNIFE AND HE'S GONNA STAB ME!

!-!

"W-w-who's there?" I warn you, I HAVE A PEN! "I'm armed to the t-t-teeth and I know ju—umm, tae…ju-tae-kara-do!"

"Then use your 'ju-tae-kara-do', KITSUNE BRAT! I'm coming for you!" Ahh! Well at least I know it's not the father…it's one of the creepy daughters with the limp who won't ever stop hunting you until she sees blood!

"BACK OFF, LIMPING DEMON GIRL! YOU WON'T GET ME!" Especially if I take off running!

Ahhh! She's following me! GO AWAY, DEMON GIRL!

"DEMON GIRL, AM I? COME SAY THAT TO MY FACE, YOU OVERGROWN PUFFBALL!"

"NOTHING WILL MAKE ME TURN AROUND! I'M GETTING AWAY FROM YOU!"

"COWARD! I'LL MAKE YOU STOP!" She's gonna throw something at me, isn't she!

"DON'T THROW CRAYONS, THAT'S NOT FAIR!" Wait, crayons? "WHO THROWS A CRAYON?"

"I DO, SO STOP BEFORE I LAUNCH ONE UP YOUR BUTT CRACK!" Oh like hell you will!

"YOU CAN'T EAT ME! I'LL EAT YOU FIRST!" I gotta charge her down! Here goes my wellbeing! "AAAHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Shippo, WAIT!"

Well THAT made me stop.

"How…do you know my name?"

"Shippo, can you not tell who I am?" Well…let's see…long dark hair, looks to be about 18 human years, smells like a demon, red eyes, wearing the shortest skirt known to man (even shorter than Kagome's) and a black, tight tank top that tapers off to end just above her bellybutton, a pack of 386 crayons is strapped to a black belt low on her hips, about 90 of the crayons are missing, the skirt's red, and she's wearing thigh high boots. And she's the hottest thing I've ever seen, including Kagome.

Yeah, if I'd met her, I'd remember.

"I have no idea who you are."

"WHY THE HELL NOT? You SERIOUSLY don't remember who I am?"

"Can't say I do…and you don't look at all like Kagome described you."

"…WHAT!"

"Like the girl in the story with the bowl haircut and the kimono and the possessed eyes. But I suppose if you're still set on eating me, I'm gonna take you down."

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about and I don't wanna EAT you. But I don't see how you can't—" She looked down at her outfit…"OH! Well no wonder you couldn't recognize me!"

…? She's dissolved into a cloud! Oh great, now she blends into the fog. Wait, I can see a shadow in there…that's shrinking?

"There!" Well at least the cloud's going away so I can—OH MY GOD!

THAT'S SOUTEN?

"SOUTEN?"

"YES! Yay, Shippo, you remember me!" Oh God, she's DANCING. The little pudgy fluffball is DANCING.

"Oh GOD, that was YOU a second ago?"

"Yep!"

"GO BACK TO THAT, GO BACK!"

"Hey, I just changed, so I'm not changing back so soon. You're just gonna have to wait." The sexy clothes…they're so…baggy on her…the tank top now goes down to her knees and the miniskirt is no longer such since it goes to her ankles. The boots got lost…wonder where they went? And her hair's back now in a puffy high bun much like mine. DAMMIT.

"How can you change like that?"

"Well…I dunno, it's more like a question of will. The older I get, the harder it is to go back to this form. But I can still hold my younger shape, if I really want to."

"Why would you WANT to stay younger?"

She's staring at me. "I could ask you the same question."

"You can…tell that I'm older than I let on?"

"It took me a while to realize, but I finally did."

"How? When? HOW?"

"Well…because you had the same look on your face that I did. Like your skin's too tight." I'll admit, she does look a little stretched…do I LOOK LIKE THAT?

"And yes, you do look like me right now." When could she read minds? "And if you're wondering if I just read your mind, you just had that shocked look on your face." Well as much as that response makes me think she can read my mind, I'll just let it go.

"So how do I…change like you do?"

"You mean get older?"

"Yeah, that. How would I go about doing that?"

Oh great, now she's grinning. That means pain and suffering. "You have to tell someone why you wanted to stay younger."

"And how do you KNOW all this?"

Well at least the grin doesn't look so evil. "I had the same problem…"

"Wanna talk about it?" Well I can at least try to be nice.

"I'll only tell if you tell." Oh fine.

"Well…I wanted to stay younger because I really like Kagome and I don't think she'd like me if I got older since I really can't compete with Inuyasha who likes her too he just won't admit it but that's why I wanted to stay younger so she'd still pay attention to me." Wow I didn't know I could talk that fast.

"Now all you have to do is let all that fear go." Maybe if you let go of my paws, I could concentrate.

"I'm sorry, what'd you say?"

"Let all that fluffball anxiety go."

"How?"

"Convince yourself."

Convince myself…what does THAT mean? Well…I guess…Kagome'll probably still like me, even if I'm older and different…she won't be nearly as cuddly cuz I won't be as cute, but she'll still be my friend…and I guess I don't really LOVE Kagome…I just got fixated on her since she was like my mom only not so no incest…and Inuyasha and Kagome fit together…I want them to be happy…and I still fit into that.

"Did you do it?" Yeah smile all you want, now that you've changed back to your older self.

"Yeah, I did it. What the hell are you, my conscience?"

Aww she laughed. How adorable. "Now just look down."

HOLY CRAP THE GROUND'S FARTHER AWAY! And my pants just became capris…albeit baggy ones. My little vest grew with me, as did my shirt…I don't understand this process at all.

"You wanna see how you look?" She's leading me to a little creek…the sun's risen up, so the fog's going away, so I can see now.

Hey! I don't look that bad! My face elongated a little, but it looks like I fit it more. My hair looks healthy and unelectrocuted and NOT in the sad little blow! And my shoulders filled out better…my paws are tan hands now, although armed with long claws. And everything's more muscled. OH YEAH.

"I'll admit it's a change from what I'm used to…but it's for the better, I suppose."

She's smiling again. Oh and giving me the once over. "Yeah, I'd say so."

"Hey, you never told me why YOU wanted to stay younger."

"Oh, er yes, umm…" HA SHE'S BLUSHING!

"Just say it."

"Promise not to laugh?" It's obviously going to be good if she's fidgeting like that.

"Yeah, I promise."

"Okay well…I wanted to stay the same size as you." Is it possible for her to get redder?

"Hehehehehehe…wait seriously?"

"YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T LAUGH!"

"Hey, don't shove me!"

"I'll do what I want!" Oh that's it, she's going down! She's jumping all about the forest and I'm launching after her with my newfound agility and strength. Ooh I just took down a tree! Oops. And nearly took out Souten in the process.

"YOU ALMOST HIT ME!"

"Whaddya gonna do about it?"

"IDIOT!" Oww, pinning against a tree and not letting up is NOT nice! Gotta make her loosen her grip on my arms…

"You're the sexiest demon I've ever met!" Ahaha now that her grip's loosened I can break out and do THIS!

"Hey, you can't pin ME to a tree! LET GO!"

"Well you just did!"

"I'm allowed to, I'm a girl!"

"I can see that." She's blushing again…oh I am sooo evil sometimes .

"Shippo…" Oh drat, maybe I pushed too far. I'll let her go then.

"Did you mean what you said a second ago?"

"That I can see you're a girl? Yeah—"

"No, no, not that. The other thing. Do you really think I'm sexy?"

Oh great, point to me for putting myself in an awkward situation.

"Well…" great now I'm blushing. "Yes."

"So you think I'm seeexy…"

"Yes…"

"You think I'm sexy…"

"For the love of GOD, YES, ALRIGHT?"

"You think I'm sexy!"

"STOP SINGING IT IN THAT VOICE, I'LL TAKE IT BACK."

"Shippo thinks I'm sexy, Shippo thinks I'm sexy…"

"STOP SINGING LIKE THAT!"

"HEY EVERYONE, SHIPPO THINKS I'M SEXY!"

"Yeah, I heard him say it." OH MY GOD WHEN'D A FARMER GET HERE?

…And he's not leaving, just leering at Souten…

"So you gonna give him some?"

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ON?" Souten's gonna pop a blood vessel...I so don't blame her….

"Well if not him, then me?"

"OH THAT'S DISGUSTING. GET OUT OF HERE!"

"You know you want some of this." Oh GOD HE'S SHAKING HIS ASS AT US.

"Souten told you to get out of here, so do it, you disgusting pervert."

Okay he's still shaking his ass and he isn't leaving. Time for plan b: DECAPITATION.

And when I say decapitation, I mean his OTHER head.

this is a lapse in time

"Thanks, Shippo. That farmer was creepy." We got out of there after I'd finished with him. Now that my hand's been purged by soap and river water, I think I'll be ok.

"You are so welcome."

"Shippo?"

"What?"

"That was really nice of you."

"I only did what was necessary to rid the world of a pervert."

"Yeah, but you defended me."

"Sure we'll go with that."

"You know…" Hmm her hands are on my chest. I like that. "I'm glad you got older."

"Why?"

"So we can do things like this." She leans in and gives me a lovely, heavenly, I'm-going-to-explode kiss. And I so kiss back, what am I, DAFT? Of course I kiss back.

And then we part, dammit.

"Since when'd you get so forward, Souten?" My breath's a little fast. Oooh my first kiss, yesssssss yes yes.

"I dunno. Just something about you brings it out in me." My hands go around her waist.

"I don't mind a bit."

it's over!

YAY! Well now another chappie's done. There will be one more, I think…well at least one more. I don't think there'll be more. I'm unsure though. I finally updated! Huzzah! And Shippo WASN'T moody, he was just horny! NOT SO ADORABLE NOW, IS HE!

Souten: No, now he's drop dead sexy.

Me: Who asked?

Souten: You. Hey guess what, I'm not a virgin anymore.

Me: AWKWARD AWKWARD AWKWARD NEVER EVER TELL ME THAT AGAIN I CAN'T HEAR YOU LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA.

And obviously whoever tells you an author has control of all the people she's writing about is WRONG! Quiet Souten. Oh and sorry for the cheesy moral somewhere in there. Screw morals.

Well R&R soon please! It'll boost your karma points!


End file.
